The Green Knight

1: Jerry's girlfriend left him.
2: Really? Why?
1: Well, he is a drug addict.
2: Yeah, but a functional one.
1:Yeah....
He trails off into thought.
2: Thinking about your lost love?
1: I don't have a lost love.
2: You should get one though.
1: Mmmm.
He lapses into though again.
2: You know what you should get? A magical pixie girl.
1: No.
2: You're a depressed young man. Depressed young men need magical pixie girls to make them realize the value of life.
1: I don't want a magic pixie girl.
2: Do it.
1: No.
They both lapse into silence. The Green Knight enters.
GK: Hey, you guys wanna chop my head off?
1: Not really.
2: A little.
GK: Have at it.
2: Well not right now.
GK: Well you feel free anytime.
2: Thanks. I'll keep that in mind.
The Green Knight takes his leave.
2: The Green Knight's a good guy.
1: Yeah.
2: Probably not going to chop his head off.
1: No.
2: Well I've gotta get going to work. Later.
1: Later.

Wizard Magic

1: Come on dude. Use some of your wizard magic.
2: I don't have any wizard magic. I only have regular magic.

Only Eagle Scouts get into the Celestial Kingdom.